2018

my contract was up and i left. i cant keep going. im crying a lot again.

my mom told me she wasnt really depressed. she just wanted to get out of her work situation. she wanted us to care. she told me she stopped caring about me when i turned 18

my dad has nothing to say to me. he just feels betrayed. am i even allowed to feel that, too? if i get negative, they start yelling and screaming about me. when they do i have to shut up or get thrown out

i havent seen any of my friends in years. i bet they hate me even more. they deserve to hate me. i just faded away

 

ive spend ages in my little room just crying. i have to stop when they come up here to smoke. they get angry at me. they wont let me be sad because i have a roof over my head. i climb on the roof to smoke myself. i see my neighbours living a life i want.

 

why cant i just be good enough to do anything