2010
i cant do my follow-up education because school needs to sign for it now, but the school wont sign until i officially get my diploma. i need it before then
i fucking hate everything
i explained it so many times. i told them they wanted me to get the internship, so i did. i fucking did. i fucking did the dumb fucking thing they wanted from me and they said no anyway
i bought a bag of weed again. fuck everything.
im losing my job because inspection came by and found out the 60 year old grandpa cant climb ladders and reach the top of some fucking painting on a floor i dont even have to clean
i swiped wine from the last party at my job and im gonna chug these this xmas and new year
Here I journal my empty days and how I'm wasting my fucking life.
I have instruments I don't play, pencils & brushes I don't use, friends I'm scared of talking to and no one to hold.
I watch dumb fucking shows and videos. I've sold all my hobbies just to make rent. I barely brush my teeth once a month. I haven't been to a doctor in a decade.
I'm scared to go outside and all I do is smoke fucking dope to empty my dumb fucking skull.
I fucking hate myself and you should hate me, too.
RATGIRL FEMCEL NEET
A creative writing project that journals my worst years in a heavily edited form.